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I just had the weirdest dream. I went to a Toys-R-Us. All I wanted… - joining the world of missing persons [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]

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[Aug. 15th, 2006|04:38 pm]
[fucking |scaredfreaked the fuck out]

I just had the weirdest dream.

I went to a Toys-R-Us. All I wanted was a coloring book and one of those boxes of crayons with like 50 different colors in it, but one of those boxes of crayons with 7 different colors in it would have worked just fine. Instead, there were like 100 boxes of crayons, but they all had the same color in them. There would be a box of 50 brown crayons. Or a box of 6 purple crayons and a gray crayon. All shit like that. When I moved on to try to find markers or colored pencils instead, the same thing was up with them. So I stood there in the aisle, and I would see a box of crayons out of the corner of my eye that looked like it had all different colors, and then when I picked it up it would be full of black crayons or 50 red crayons and 20 green crayons. There was this really precocious little girl in the aisle with me, along with her family, and she was looking for the same thing. Except eventually she found a box of all different color markers and left and I was alone and the lights were all turning off.

So, in Scranton, the Toys-R-Us is not far from my mom's house, it's like a 5-minute drive up the highway. So I went into the foyer of the store where the checkout counters were, thinking I would call her collect from one of the payphones to come and get me and she wouldn't care because a local call is like 30 cents. SO I walked up to the first payphone and as I did, This group of people walk in. They all looked plastic like that Primus video where they're all cowboys, and I started to get freaked out because that video always scared me. I hear a little kid next to me go, "That's Russell Crowe!" but as I looked at the lead guy, it looked more like keanu reeves to me. So I keep walking toward the payphone and as I am, I hear these guys talking about how they wouldn't sell most of the shit in the store out of the back of a U-Haul at 3 am. So I ignored them.

As I got up to the payphone, I went to pick it up and it wasn't a payphone at all. At this point I'm terrified of these plastic guys and I really want to leave, so I'm confused, but not before I realize what I thought was a phone is actually a poster. It's a poster for Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, and Keanu Reeves is on it, and he has REAL HAIR, and his head is kind of sticking out of the poster. He looks plastic on the poster, too. The real hair is kind of blowing in the breeze and as I look at it, I notice it looks like the hair had been cut off of a person's head and kind of slopped into place and painted so it wouldn't be bloody. So I walked away looking for a real payphone and saw one across the room. As I was walking toward it, I notice the plastic guys walking toward me, and I started to feel really scared, and then I woke up.

Dude, honestly, this is the last shit I need.